La balena doula & kraamzorg

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la balena doula & kraamzorg

My story

Most people giving birth now grew up expecting to make their own choices in life. They desire and expect autonomy. Yet pregnancy and birth are never very much under our control. In many respects, this experience demands us to ‘surrender’. And yet, there are also many respect in which the stakes are very high and being the boss over our body, our baby, and our own life, is more important than ever.

I’m Myrte, a certified birth and postpartum doula. I was educated to counsel people and organisations on questions of life, meaning and ethics. I learned to better understand how my own experiences are shaped by culture and society. In pregnancy and birth, however ‘private’, the personal and political meet too. On a personal level many layers of a lifestory may surface in unexpected ways, baring both strengths and weaknesses. Becoming a parent is a deeply personal, impactful and meaningful development. At the same time you may be confronted with the best and the worst in our culture: lifesaving medical science, parents who are supported and honoured in their new identity, but also the persistent, suffocating expectations for mothering, organisations and people that want to deliver top notch care, but are susceptible to conflicts of interest. This landscape impacts our experience and can be complex to navigate.

While I was doing well in my studies – after almost dropping out of highschool in my teen years – I went on a journey to feel more at home in my own body and experience more mental and emotional freedom. I encountered mindfullness and after some courses I started a very intensive zen-coaching training. After a masters in philosophy and editing a book about organisation and humanisation, I worked for a local government for five years a secretary for the board. This gave me a look behind the scenes of society and into the heart of political decisionmaking. At the same time, besides advising and some bureaucracy, I did a lot of coaching for small groups and individuals. After two years I knew my path would take a different turn.

Becoming a mother was a time of utter bliss but also totally desorienting. A journey of fulfilment in many ways and also unexpected despair, loneliness, and rage. Especcially after my husband got very sick. I found little understanding in literature or even from people close to me. It brought back my interests in contemporary experience of birth and mothering, and a deeply felt mission to be invloved and support other women.

The experience of illness pushed me to follow my heart, even if this meant changing careers completely. It took a while for our family to find a new balance. When the second pregnancy came along, the time was right to birth my own ‘new life’. So I started Mothering Present.

What’s in a name 

I wish I could explain why I have a fascination for Whales (la balena – in Italian because it sounds fancy). They are the greatest mammals on earth, the strongest, and yet they are threatened. They dive deep and long into the depths of the ocean. They are incredibly social and smart. All of this has made people all over the world associate whales with emotional wisdom, love and connection. They have a very special, beautiful song; they send clear messages. They may be solitary and yet communities are important to them. All of these things remind me of birth. And last but not least, whales are generally described as magnificent. I wish for the wonder, this incredible gift of birth, to get the love, attention, and protection it deserves. 

    My core values

    Spirited, mindful, at ease, these are important values to me:

    • Spirited (“bezield” in Dutch, “with soul/animated”) to me means: to embrace this life right here, en to be guided bij what is most important to you. To make choices aligned with your spirit, your core values, your vision of life. I wish for parents (to be) to make choices that are meaningful to you within the context of your unique life story, uninhibited by fears, protocols, or anyone thinking they know better whats best for you.
    • Mindfulness, or simply attention, maybe the most important gift of a doula, in a world where care is so often reduced to risk assesment (which has its own value). The doula effect is real: having a doula at birth even reduces the length of labor. I believe this has more to do with attention that with al the specific know how.
    • Being at ease, even in the midst of a storm, thats what mindfullness can bring. Who doesn’t need more of that these days? But especially during pregnancy, birth and the postpartum period, the basics of mindfulness can make the difference for a more calm and positive experience.

    Education

    2023 

    2022

    • The power of awareness. Tara Brach & Jack Kornfield. An online mindfulness training. Certificate from the University of California, Berkeley’s Greater Good Science Center and the Awareness Training Institute
    • Humanising Birth, critical midwifery studies. Summerschool Universiteit Utrecht / Universiteit voor Humanistiek.
    • Certificering Kraamdoula. Doula Academie, Monnickendam.
    • EHBO en EHAK. First aid / CPR for adults and children.
    • Certified Birth Doula. Doula Academie, Monnickendam. (picture: me getting best essay prize 🙂 )

    2021 Superhero adventure, Course for personal development and career

    2019 Flow, Personal and professional development (through employer).

    2013-2016 Master Philosophy, EUR

    2014-2016 Zencoach, Zen.nl 

    2014 Mindfulness Based Stress Reduction, Bodhi Rotterdam.

    2009-2013 Bachelor Humanistic Studies, UvH, cum laude (training for humanistic counselors / organisational consultant

    la balena doula & kraamzorg

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